R-E-S-P-E-C-T: In Defense of the Disney Bride

I had the amazing opportunity to attend a design blogger conference last weekend. For a day and a half, I was able to rub elbows with bloggers that have become icons in the world of design, many of whom have earned a permanent place in my Google Reader. We listened to panels and had the opportunity to socialize and meet IRL (In Real Life), which just made my month. I really love blogging and I really, really love bloggers, so this event simply could not have been any better.

Well, sort of.

On the first day of the conference, I wandered in and started chatting with a few of the participants. Both of them were small-time bloggers and we whispered excitedly about all of the “big time” bloggers we had noticed wandering around…until, unexpectedly, one of the big time bloggers tapped me, introduced herself, and asked me what my blog was about.

I responded with a small shrug and said, “Oh, I just blog about weddings…Disney weddings.” Even as the words fell out of my mouth, I was surprised with myself. There was that hint of guilt in there…that little apologetic lilt to my voice. I might as well have said, “My blog is too dumb to mention, you should move on.” As the panel began and the discussion on design blogs got started, I was nagged by a question that wouldn’t leave me alone. Why had I played it down like that? I really like my blog and I love Disney weddings. Why wasn’t I shouting that from the rooftops?

I figured it out the next day. Every time I introduced myself and told people what I blogged about, I had the intense urge to rush in and say, “It’s really geeky, but I like it” or “It’s just a fun little hobby.” This was because every time someone heard the words “Disney wedding”, they looked at me like a design leper. The people at this conference were hip, young, stylish design professionals and throwing the word “Disney” into a conversation caused them to scatter like startled geese.

I tried to stand my ground, once I was aware of my insecurities, but it didn’t help much. Every person I met at the conference was friendly, smart, and inspiring, but not a single one of them could take the concept of Disney weddings seriously. I got reactions that ranged from “Are you serious? That’s so funny. I didn’t know people seriously did that” to “If I knew someone was having a Disney wedding, I would make fun of them.”

People asked me if the brides wore princess Halloween costumes down the aisle or if Mickey Mouse himself performed the ceremonies. But the worst of the worst was when one of my design idols asked me, in all honesty, “I’m a little surprised that you’re at this conference? I mean, how can you blog about style and design if you’re blogging about Disney weddings…isn’t that an oxymoron?”

It was then that I realized what had caused me to be so apologetic on that first day. Every single Disney bride I know, including myself, has faced criticism of her wedding at one point or another because she chose to have it on Disney property. I didn’t struggle with it much because nobody was too surprised with our decision, given our history and the fact that I’m a serious Disney fangirl. But when I hear about some of the comments other brides have had to face, it breaks my heart. For example:

• Many brides have had at-home Disney themed receptions for the same price that a Disney wedding would have been, because their family refused to support or attend a wedding on Disney property.
• A past bride’s co-workers wouldn’t even look at her wedding pictures because she had a Disney wedding.
• Nearly every bride I know has been asked if Mickey Mouse was going to be performing the ceremony, walking her down the aisle, or stepping in for the groom.
• One memorable story involved a curt “Why can’t you grow up?” from a bride’s mother.
  

I’ve read about many brides going on the defensive about their wedding, usually by pointing out all the non-Disney features (such as the Boardwalk) or rushing to explain that they aren’t going to do anything crazy, like have characters at the wedding. The problem with this, of course, is that it still sort of throws the Disney wedding idea under the bus, suggesting that brides who do incorporate Disney into their wedding day are just immature, unoriginal, or nuts.

I’ll admit that I got a little defensive at the conference. By mid-day, I was throwing out stats left and right about how organized Disney is, how much value you get for what you spend, and all the design options that are available to today’s Disney brides. Everyone was nice and seemed fairly interested, but the reaction of each person could pretty much be summed up in a comment I got from a fellow wedding blogger: “Well, if it makes them happy, who cares what other people think?”

Well, maybe that’s the attitude that a lot of brides have had to adopt when faced with critics, but I personally think something has to be done. I started out as a Disney bride who just wanted to blog about pulling her wedding day together, but over the last two years I have met a ton of Disney brides and seen some of the most stylish, spectacular, and special weddings you could ever imagine and I am honestly irked that these friends of mine could be panned automatically for having their weddings at Disney.

So, I feel like pushing up my sleeves and getting a little hands-on with the reputation of Disney weddings. This blog started out as a personal blog for our wedding planning and then sort of morphed into a brag book for my favorite Disney weddings, but in the next couple of weeks you’re all going to see some big changes. My plan is to turn this site into a combination community center/info hub/style resource/showcase for real Disney weddings that beautifully and stylishly capture the joy of these amazing events.

This is going to be big and it’s going to be stylish and it’s going to be Disney. Stay tuned!

"The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing."
~ Walt Disney